Malinka's Studio

A crazy girl, in a small studio :) :) :)

Meeting my Ideal Man

Videocall943_sketchDear Friends, let me share with you how I met my ideal man. At 21 I met a very nice young man, he was the ideal man for me, very smart, very nice body and well educated. It was a cultural shock for me to discover this man’s mind and presence. He worked for a public institution in my city so he had a suit on and after work he had the simplest t-shirt, as I said, the ideal man!!! We became friends and shortly I became obsessed with him. I was so in love that I would follow him everywhere and made sure to join him in all his trips. Shortly his internship was over and he went on to another country, doing another internship. I was not sad that he left because I knew that at that stage of my life, I was not ready or willing to wear all Lacoste and eat with a fork and a knife. I was at the stage when I was working as a waitress to support myself and was eating while rushing to class or work. So I thought to myself: you are not at his level at the moment, once time will pass and things will get better, how knows??? maybe it will happen. Because we kept in touch this feeling got even stronger. I thought to myself that if I really want to get to this guy’s level, I should work on myself. Here the English lessons started, better grades, and instead of working in a bar I applied for a position at an embassy, and then at an international consultancy company. I started being very socially active, got involved in NGOs, charity activities, international projects, conferences and business trips, reading like crazy, writing and publishing articles … I was always looking to meet more interesting and important people so that I could cultivate myself. When the time comes I want to meet him again and take his breath away! Every decision that I made was based on: would his girlfriend (but I was thinking wife) settle for this level or she would push more and get better results??? Every event that I attended was based on the same logic: is this event interesting enough for his wife? Every peace of clothing or jewel was carefully researched and selected on the same criteria.  Basically, I dragged my ass from a world of waiting tables to an international business environment and I enjoyed every moment of it!!! I became an elegant girl and at the same time I could relax and just go out for a beer. I was doing all these thinking that I have all the potential of making it in this world and getting my ideal man. We kept in touch and he always knew about my activities and was genuine happy for me, happy and proud. I was thinking to myself that the magic day is coming and 2 years of hard work on myself will pay out. We kept in touch even if we constantly moved and lived in other countries.
During the Autumn we agreed to spend the new year’s eve together in Budapest, since it is very close to his country. From the conversation I felt that he is on the same page as me, this would mean more that a visit to Budapest, this would mean another try for us as a couple. This time I had all the cards in my sleeve!!!

to be continue at Meeting my Ideal Man – 2

December 29, 2012 Posted by | Dating, Obsessions | , , , , | 10 Comments

I feel excited about my life and i really like it!

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERATime heals nothing, its what you do during that time that counts, its how you feel and what transformation happen to you is the most important.

Dear friends, Budapest is an amazing city!!! it has greatness and a historic
atmosphere that is amazing, especially during the winter with all the lights and
snow. I don’t know if this is just the adrenaline of just moving here or if this will last for a while, but I really hope it will !!!

Another interesting aspect is the discovering of people, it is amazing how different people are, compared to what I was told about them or compared to the stereotypes i know about their nation/region…

I am away from my family for the holidays but I try to stay positive, to focus on new things and new people!

In simple words, I feel excited about my life and i really like it! 🙂 🙂 🙂

December 26, 2012 Posted by | Social life | , , , | 4 Comments

It might sun but I just don’t see it

I recently received a job offer in another country and I accepted it with no reserves. I do not know why but I am not happy where I live now. Everybody keeps showing me that I have all the possible conditions to be very happy and still I’m not. I have my own place, I make good money for witch I work hard and still I can’t feel any enjoyment. I was thinking that this could be because I was single but I was dating someone and it didn’t make me feel any better. It is like everybody keeps pointing to the sun and I can’t see or feel it. It is the holidays season and I’m running from what I call now “my home” with no remorse.
Before leaving I made the usual steps: farewell party and making my boss very angry with this decision, he said that anyone with half of brain would see that this is a bad choice! I organised 2 parties: for my ex-colleagues and for my friends. At the first one only 1 person showed up and at the second – 4. I appreciate their efforts with all my hearth since the weather was terrible but this again proves my point: I’m not happy here, I don’t even have friends.
The move is very very sudden and I have to leave tomorrow morning. I was very lucky to find a place to stay, I received some important documents, managed to rent my own apartment and clarified all possible issues. I feel like faith is telling me that this is a good leave. I hope that this will be true and that in this new country I will find whatever it is missing from my life.
I read a book about a Russian girl that dreamed that she will see the sea. She felt that she will not be happy until this happens. When she grew up that was the only thing on her mind: to see the sea. When she finally reached it, by the seashore she was stabbed by some drunk sailors… I am just afraid that some random people will kill my hope that some other place will be different. The only different thing  is that I’m only half Russian and half Romanian so I believe that it doesn’t apply to me 🙂 🙂 🙂
I am writing now from the center of my pity party were the only guest that arrived is me and the only reason why I am posting this is because I’m tipsy and probably will delete it tomorrow.
I hope to write soon with the very first impression of Budapest, this is where I’m moving. Since I’m so self-centered I wanted to write about my fears and not about the city of witch I know frankly nothing, yet 🙂 🙂 🙂

December 13, 2012 Posted by | Social life | , , | 7 Comments

   

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